But he stands alone, and who can oppose him? He does whatever he pleases. He carries out his decree against me, and many such plans he still has in store. That is why I am terrified before him; when I think of all this, I fear him. God has made my heart faint; the Almighty has terrified me. Yet I am not silenced by the darkness, by the thick darkness that covers my face. Job 23:13-17 NIV
I’m grateful that the story of Job includes the emotions he experienced. I need to know that it’s okay to be frightened. This righteous man of God saw no end to the suffering, no healing in sight and it scared him, just like it would scare you and I.
Where then does wisdom come from? Where does understanding dwell? It is hidden from the eyes of every living thing, concealed even from the birds in the sky. Destruction and Death say, “Only a rumor of it has reached our ears.” God understands the way to it and he alone knows where it dwells, for he views the ends of the earth and sees everything under the heavens. When he established the force of the wind and measured out the waters, when he made a decree for the rain and a path for the thunderstorm, then he looked at wisdom and appraised it; he confirmed it and tested it. And he said to the human race, “The fear of the Lord—that is wisdom, and to shun evil is understanding.” Job 28:20-28 NIV
Without question, Job understood that God was so much higher than man. Why was he suffering so much? Why did it feel like God had turned against him? He yearned for wisdom enough to understand it all, but he realized that God alone had the answers. He had to come to terms with the thought that he may never understand. God did not owe him an explanation. At the end of the day Job had all the wisdom he really needed – fear God and shun evil.
On top of everything else Job had to endure, his closest friends sat by his side and tormented him with the thought that he was suffering because he had offended God! His friend Bildad put it this way, “Dominion and awe belong to God; he establishes order in the heights of heaven. Can his forces be numbered? On whom does his light not rise? How then can a mortal be righteous before God?” Satan was determined to break Job down and bring him to the place where he would just give up; to lead him to conclude there was no point in living righteously if this was what it lead to. How then can a mortal be righteous before God? He wanted Job to believe that God took no pleasure in his righteousness, that perhaps He hadn’t even noticed.
But no matter how hard it was, even when Satan made Job feel like God had denied him justice, Job simply would not give up! He would not forsake integrity. He was committed to God and he was determined to live a righteous life. Job stayed the course!
As surely as God lives, who has denied me justice, the Almighty, who has made my life bitter, as long as I have life within me, the breath of God in my nostrils, my lips will not say anything wicked, and my tongue will not utter lies. I will never admit you are in the right; till I die, I will not deny my integrity. I will maintain my innocence and never let go of it; my conscience will not reproach me as long as I live. Job 27:2-6 NIV